october 17, 2007.
i was 11 years old when i first heard the joshua tree
. it was the first album that i ever really, truly loved. through the years each of the 11 tracks has probably been at one point my favorite song on the album, but the one that i always seem to come back to is "i still haven't found what i'm looking for". the song is without question bono's religious manifesto, something that i can relate to only superficially. but the thing that i love so much about music and art is that even in the face of such obvious personal meaning on the part of the artist, i can still take from it exactly what i want, exactly what i need
to. no matter your religious beliefs, i think that most people can probably relate to feeling unfulfilled in some form or another. to feeling like, no matter the physical belongings one possesses or the satisfaction one takes from different aspects of their life, there is still one thing that is missing. to feeling the sentiment expressed by the song's title--"i still haven't found what i'm looking for". in so many ways i feel like i have lived a charmed life--loving family, personal successes, professional successes, it seems like good things have a way of finding me. but sometimes i do feel like i still haven't really
found what i'm looking for.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
i was looking through my old posts the other day and stumbled across this draft of a post that i had written back in october, 2007, but never actually published. it was written during a time in my life when i had recently achieved a professional accomplishment which i am still proud of today, and was able to reflect back on my life with a lot of pride and satisfaction. but it was also during a time of great personal turmoil, in which i was coming to terms with the fact that the relationship i was in was not everything that i had hoped it would be. the post was written in a therapeutic sense, as a way for me to figure my own feelings out, and ends with the quality of an unfinished thought. it took me a little more time to finish the thought and face my reality, but i eventually did. i share this now because of how starkly these feelings and this song title contrast with my current state of mind, and provides a nice precursor to what is coming at the end of this week. i finally found what i was looking for
...u2 : "i still haven't found what i'm looking for"
from the lp the joshua tree